“You are like your father!”

“You will end up being like your mother!”

Imagine such words being hurled at someone who is trying to live his life better than how his father did. It can be quite traumatizing. This can be bad if it comes from someone else; it can be worse if it comes from you; from that voice in your head. If it were someone else, you could tell them to shut up or simply refrain from being around them. However, if it comes from you, it can be hard because sometimes you can find yourself unintentionally going through that pattern of thought.

So, what if your father is violent?! What if your mother neglects her children?! What if your brother is a criminal?! Does it mean you will automatically end up being like them? NO! You might look like your father; you might sound like your mother, but you are not them. You are your own person. You can make decisions for your life. You can decide to break off that bad cycle and live a more fulfilling life.

It’s important that when you notice a negative pattern of thinking, you talk with someone you trust. Talking can help ease off the tension in our hearts. Don’t keep those emotions locked up. If you feel you need professional help, go for it! There is no shame in asking for help. Engaging a professional will help you identify the root cause of your problem which is one step closer towards healing.